Here's my latest scenario - I wake up after a glorious nights sleep to a phone call from Scotty, wailing about how awful this movie was he watched the previous night. It didn't just stop at, "It was SUCH a rubbish film!" either. Oh no. It went on... and on and on and on! Complaining about politics and racism and all sorts of bollocks that is seriously far too much for me to take in while I'm still blurry-eyed and caffeine-less.
Throw in a handful of the F word and that was the start of my hideous morning.
It went on... to him calling me throughout the day to tell me how full of farts he was and that his stomach was sore because he couldn't get them out. Marvelous... really what I needed to complete my day.
I think I gave everyone a bit of a shiny version of Scotty. He isn't the Mr. Perfect you all think he is... but then, no one is are they???
Scotty has a past filled with drugs... cocaine to be specific. He still does it from time to time and that scares me. He drinks every night too - literally his skin tone is red... not olive or tanned or pale... red. It's from the booze. Alcohol has that effect on you after a while.
He's also quite insensitive. If we're not spending the evening together, he will go out and drink himself silly (THEN DRIVE!!!) but during the time that he is out he doesn't even send me one text. Not one.
Am I being silly?
I've never really thought of myself as the nagging type before but honestly, out of your whole evening a text message to let me know that you're OK would take 2 minutes.
He'd never get violent with me, ever. He still treats me like a Queen but he has his downfalls... and unfortunately, they're big ones. I don't want to be in that lifestyle. Maybe that's one of the reasons I am so smitten with Alex.
As for Alex... well... the delicious shirtless meetings continue on in the gym after work. It takes every ounce of my concentration to avert my eyes. Thank God I don't think he's noticed my growing fascination with him yet... probably because he hasn't noticed ME yet!
Anyway... so I think he must have been kind of impressed with me in the gym this week because he did text and ask when I'll be going back next week.
He has also decided to start opening up to me about the breakup with his ex. If you'll remember, she's the bleached blond, sun-bed scorched, anorexic chick with a lollipop head that looks kind of like this (but worse):
God knows what he EVER saw in her....
Anyway, so as most breakups go, it's pretty messy. She's devastated and threatening to 'destroy' him (her words....) Creepy.
I told him flat out that she sounds like a whiny little brat. Which she is.... #justsaying.
He asked me for advice on what to do because she sent him these seriously crazy text message filled with bitchiness and bitterness.
My advice was to ignore her. By replying, it only fuels the fire. It is a reaction that she is looking for after all.....
So as for right now, this is pretty much my roll:
Shut up, look pretty, listen and advise.
I can do that.
Oh yeah, I've decided in this blog I'll be Rachel by the way.
I like to think I look similar to her... and our dress sense pretty much makes us soul sisters.
OK, so now you know a little bit more about Scotty... now you know the good, the bad and the terrible.
I didn't share that because I wanted to get you on my side. I shared it because it will help you gain more of an idea as to why my eyes are wondering and why I am questioning my relationship.
If anything, I want this anonymous blog that I am really starting to enjoy to be full of the complete truth.
Scotty and I have built up so many exciting plans over the past few months of dating and he's already hinted to me that he's been ring shopping. I suppose if he's going to start spending his money on diamonds and a nice tux instead of cocaine then maybe there's a chance... but what if we get married and then he just goes back to his old ways?
Marriage..... I can't believe I'm even talking about that already. I'm going absolutely bonkers.
WHY is life so confusing!? - I wail in a spot-on Rachel Bilson voice.
Sounds complicated yes. I ask myself the same question because there is almost no moment that life is easy...
ReplyDeleteI can only say what I would do for me... I couldn't handle a man who drank all the time and who drove drunk... he could kill someone or himself... and the occasional cocaine use would be too much.
ReplyDeleteFinally for me I think I deserve better but that is just me. I certainly cannot make decisions for other people... nor can I judge anyone else's decisions.
I'm not you and I have not lived your life... I hope you make the best decision you can for yourself... Be happy ♡
I agree with Launna, you have to do what's best for you in the end. No matter how well he treats you, Scotty sounds like he needs to help himself more. Good luck to you doll!
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Well number one, don't get married to him. Haha. As with everything else, maybe you should talk to Scotty. You must've gotten with him and been smitten for him before for a reason. And if it doesn't work out and he's still making you uncomfortable or worried, then you can end it. And don't do anything but be a good advice giving gym buddy with Alex until then.
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The Life of Little Me
Bahahaha I read that with a Rachel Bilson voice in my head too. And good choice too, I love her style and just about everything about her too. I actually started reading your current post, not realising there was another previous to it so what I say here may end up contradicting. Just an apology in advance. I tend to confuse most people with my rambles lol. So Scotty. I think as humans we all have flaws, we ain't squeaky clean and shiny 24-7. That said the drinking and drug use, is it really serious. Like, have you spoken to him about this? Maybe suggested he cut back a bit. I don't think I've ever heard of someone drinking so much that their skin takes on a new shade! And from the sounds of things to me it sounds like you're over the whole relationship and looking for reasons to leave even though in your heart you've already made that decision. Then again we all go through humps in our relationships and this could be just that. A hump that you need to get over to get to a smoother path.
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www.daringcoco.com
Hello Darling. So I caught up on and read it all. Hmm. Tough situation. I know you care for him but he doesn't sound like he has his shit together, much less marriage material. He needs to work on himself before you guys can have any sort of future. You need to look after yourself; sounds like he has a lot of growing up to do. If hes seriously already got that red drunken face THIS young, that isn't a good thing.
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