Tuesday, 24 February 2015

My Date With Alex (and what is happening with Scotty...)

Last night I met up with Alex.

It literally looked like a bomb went off in my closet with all of my clothes strewn around the place! I tried on every combination of shirts, shorts, peplum tops, turtle-necks, skirts and vests possible and strutted around in front of my full length mirror clutching onto a chilled glass of dry white wine to calm my nerves. 

But I finally settled on a little black dress. I looked good! Even I won't be shy to admit that. I made a big effort with my outfit, my hair and my makeup - and it didn't go unnoticed. He told me that I looked beautiful! Blush. 

I ordered wine, sushi and edamame beans. My usual at a seafood restaurant on the water. 
Alex opted for something non-alcoholic... because he doesn't drink... love it!! And some fishy main with veggies. 
We chatted for AGES - I actually honestly couldn't shut up! 
Then, the inevitable happened... he asked me to tell him about the guy that I met at the concert (a.k.a him!!!). 
I turned bright red and downright refused, shaking my head and looking anywhere else but at him. 
I don't really know how we stumbled our way into the rest of the conversation but we did end up discussing the fact that we kind of like each other.
He said things like a girl like me doesn't come around often in a town like we're in and that I'm smart and funny etc.... He said so many nice things - I'm easy on the eye and blah blah blah... but also mentioned that he is 10 years older than me and he worries that we are in different stages of our lives. He is wanting to settle down soon and he wanted to know where I stood and what it is that I want right now.... so it was all very mature and to the point. 
He then said that he'd like us to continue to hang out as friends and if something does happen between us, he'd like it to be slow. He lost his dad about a year ago and still has a lot he needs to deal with so I completely understand he needs things to go slowly. 

So we're friends - with obvious 'crushes' on each other. 

We actually have plans again over the weekend. He's house-sitting for his mum and has invited me over to watch movies and cook curry. As friends. He said that I can stay in the spare room. He's got such high morals that I really think that would be exactly what happens. 

He's a good guy. 
A good guy that now knows that I exist.  

Now let's move on to Scotty - a couple of you awesome readers (Corinne & Anshul in particular!) have been intrigued and asking what is happening there. 
OH MY GOD..... 

This past Sunday he came over and asked my dad for his blessing to marry me. And do you know what my dad said? Yes! 
I didn't know about this at all and the next thing I know my entire family is smiling at me like idiots while Scotty suddenly said he wanted to take me up to this gorgeous view point. 
Instantly my heart started thundering in my chest. I could feel the pulse fast and hard in my neck as we walked to the view point. In my mind I just kept repeating, 'Oh fuck! Oh fuck! Oh fuck!' 
He didn't propose. He just wanted to cuddle and look at the view. Phew. Major coincidence!!!
When we got back to the house my mum dragged me aside and hissed into my ear, 'So did he do it!?!' and I knew exactly what she was talking about. 
He told my dad when he is going to be proposing but my dad won't tell me!! 

I need to end things.... to be able to continue this thing with Alex.... but I don't know how. 
How do you end things with someone who is suicidal and emotionally unstable??? How do you break someones heart???? He's so happy with me... God knows why! He's ready to pop the question and make me his wife. 

I really don't know what to do! Please help me.... 

As for Alex.... I really don't know what is going to happen there. 
I don't know if he really likes me enough to make a proper move. 
I don't KNOW if this Whitney girl is a threat or not. He says that she is just a friend but on Facebook they really do seem like more. But I'm too proud to ask. 
He has a lot to deal with before he'll be ready to be in a relationship and you know what? That suits me perfectly because I still have Scotty to deal with and a whole bunch of my own crap. 

Just once I wish things were easier. 


  1. Oh my... I wish I could tell you what to do but then again... no... I barely know what to tell myself... You have to do what feels right and good for you... I don't think marrying Scotty is it... as for breaking his heart, it would be better to do it sooner than later... I hope you don't feel pressured because he is 'suicidal'... that isn't a good reason to stay around... you have some big decisions to make... hmm

  2. To me it sounds like Alex is a bit confused about what he wants.. you or Whitney? Scotty is definitely in love and ready to settle down and if you're not, don't waste the guys time..... as for how to soften the blow... God knows. It's not going to be easy.... it's going to hurt. But the longer you continue it the more it will hurt! That's just my opinion x


  3. wow the situation is all the time changing. But what you will do if Scotty really ask u to marry him? Maybe Alex is just a small crush now (ok, is not super small ;p) ahh i just wish you all the best!

  4. oh noooooooo! And the plot thickens... LOL.

    There's no right or wrong way, you just have to man up and tell him how you really feel.

    Good luck!

  5. wow! What a tough situation.
    Do you see yourself long term with either of the guys. You can't feel pressure not to end things with someone because they're not mentally stable. It will get worse the longer you leave it (sorry if i sound harsh) Maybe you just need to be single and enjoy life without the stresses from guys for now x

    ps. Did you find something to help with your spots?


  6. so... it is a time to admit that I am in quite similar situation... there is someone in my head and someone inmy life... I hope that faith will help us both to choose wisely!,

    Take care girl!

  7. How BADLY I wish Alex would speed up everything just a bit so you won't have to worry about making things up with Scotty. If I were to vote for these two guys, I'll probably go for Alex as he sounds mature and responsible.

  8. Ok, so this answered my question about Scotty. From the last post I thought you two had perhaps called it quits or something, but I was waaaaaaay too excited to find out more about Dr Dreamy! And man, he is perfect. Wanting to take things slowly, it's perfect for you right now. Have you confided in him about Scotty? Maybe he can lend some advice too on the subject. Your heart has obviously decided upon Alex by now! And how to break things off with Scotty? I don't envy you lovely. This is more than just a pickle and it's something you're going to have to tackle promptly too I'm afraid (yeah, easier said than done). If he's already asked for permission and all, you'll want to nip it in the bud while you can. To save yourself from more heartache, especially with your family. Maybe letting him know you know what he's up to and that it is not a good idea. That things between you both are not great and won't be ever (is that too harsh?). His alcohol and drug issues are too much for you right now and that you can't handle it. You don't want to make him change but you also can't be with the person he is. It's not fair to ask (even though it completely is!) him to change something that is such an integral part of who he is and stuff because he'll end up resenting you for it. Maybe that you both work better as friends? I don't know, just chucking some ideas out there for you but all in all I do think you need to tackle this one quick. Because once he get's down on one knee shit might hit the fan! And since things are going really well for you I'd hate to see you battling with unnecessary drama (not that breaking up with him won't bring some! But it won't be as extreme as saying "no" to his proposal. I think!). Godspeed and I hope you're having an awesome night right now with Alex!


  9. Whoa so much has happened!!! It sounds like Alex is really trying to be smart and thoughtful about his relationship with you, which is really worth something. Gahh but Scotty, especially with Dad's blessings!

  10. You are in one tricky situation! I really hope it works out for you, I do think Alex sounds like a great great guy, very responsible and balanced. Good luck!

    Hope you've had a great saturday,
    Bethany x


    Do pop over to my blog, if you fancy of course, and tell me what you think.

  11. So what happened? I'm not sure if I commented on this before. I'm so forgetful. But, I hope you've settled this. :)

    Find the balance.

  12. A black dress is always a good choice.
    And dinner with sushi and wine ... is perfect!
    Thanks for writing in my blog.

    Lady Wolff

  13. Hope you're okay! Come back!

    Corinne x

  14. Hello greetings and good wishes.

    Alex is a very nice man but I don't think he likes you so much to marry you. Scotty is crazy and even if he proposes you should not agree to marriage because you can never depend on him. While you are enjoying the company of two men, you should look around and keep your eyes open for a third person who will be a good husband to you.

    I can see you are in a difficult situation and I hope you will find a solution very soon.

    Best wishes